I THRIVE & The Kintsukuroi Project
The following five step exercise will take 15 - 20 minutes to complete.
Check out what insights surface as you give it a try below:
Step 1: a) Take one minute and write a list of three people that you admire, appreciate, love, cherish, or value. b) Next take three minutes to write three traits you admire and why in each of the three people you've written down (9 traits total). c) When you're done, you're ready to move on to Step 2.
Step 2: a) Take one minute and write a list of three people that you dislike, feel annoyed by, or frustrated by. b) Next take three minutes to write three traits you dislike and why about each of the three people you've written down (9 traits total). c) When you're done, you're ready to move on to Step 3.
Step 3: a) Now take one minute to reflect on your lists, the people you've selected and the traits you've identified. Then move on to part b) below. b) The idea of this exercise is to highlight the principal that we can only see in others what we have recognized in ourselves, have witnessed, or experienced. Or in other words, if you spot it you got it! c) In this step we are now going to take 3 minutes to consider each of the negative traits you have listed and try to identify areas in your life where you are exhibitting or have exhibited these same features. See if this can assist you to expand your circle of compassion for others and for yourself in recognizing that we often are each doing our best. d) When you're done, it's time to move on to Step 4.
Step 4: a) Now take one minute to reflect again on your lists, the people you've selected, and the traits you've identified. b) In this step we are going to now take 3 minutes to consider each of the admirable and positive traits that you have listed and try to identify areas in your life where you are exhibitting or have exhibited these same features. See if this can assist you to expand your self-awareness for your contributions and the wonderful traits you embody. c) When you're done, it's time to check out the lesson hidden within this exercise below in the 'Moral of the Story' write up under Step 5.
Step 5: The Moral of the Story... I THRIVE's creator has come across several Buddhist teachers who taught their students along their paths to self-realization the concept that we often have difficulty tolerating in others what we do not tolerate in ourselves. These persons that we have difficulty tolerating are teaching us something about ourselves that we do not wish to know. From this exercise, participants are meant to recognize that all judgement is based in self-judgement. We only see in others what we have in ourselves... or otherwise, if you spot it, you got it! This intervention may not work well in all scenarios however, in many sithuations there is truth to be gleaned and learned from. In this process we learn to recognize our own growth edges as well as our own light and darkness through witnessing those around us as mirrors into our own consciousness. By doing so, we are able to see oursevels more fully and build compassion for ourselves and others. When we don't hide ourselves from ourselves, we free up space to choose who we want to be rather than choosing from the perspecitve of the persona you may have unconsciously developed to support the image that you may have wanted to project, what you may have been socialized to believe is appropriate to project, or what you may have been conditioned to project in setting of past trauma. When we are conscious of our shadow and our light, we see ourselves for who and what we are - the whole human. This exercise is a great introduction to exploring the Shadow, or otherwise, Carl Jung's concept of the aspects of ourselves that we hide from our own conscious awareness. You might learn from this exercise that we may hide both negative and positive aspects of ourselves from ourselves. By integrating both aspects of the self, we become more fuly developed and realized in our journey toward individuation, self-realization, and healing. Take 3-5 minutes to reflect on what you've learned through your participation in The Mirror Exercise. In today's world, we are all survivors of trauma of one kind or another. It is our hope that through your participation in this exercise you will re-enter the world a little lighter, a little more healed, and just a little more kind. Thank you for being a part of I THRIVE & The Kintsukuroi Project. You Are Never Alone.
**Remember to always contact your provider prior to trialing any new therapy or treatment. Some of the techniques included here may not be appropriate for all persons.
